Jess' Blog

Sometimes, the Lord sends His blessings in such a highly unusual, dramatic, or precisely timed manner that... it is as though the Lord "signs" the blessing personally so that we will know with certainty that it comes from Him.

(Gerald N. Lund).

For those of you who don't know, I'm going through a very challenging phase in my life. More than ever, I have cried and plead to God for mercy, relief and healing. At one point I found myself crying 'O God, where art thou?', feeling completely and utterly alone, painfully hopeless and in the deepest despair and agony. The next morning, I picked up my scriptures and was lead to a passage of scripture. 2 Kings 20: 1 - 5. I could totally relate to Hezekiah's thoughts and feelings, then came the tender mercy of the Lord in verse 5:

I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears: behold, I will heal thee.

Words can't express how I felt as I read those words. For the first time in a long time I had hope. Hope. It was such a sweet feeling to finally have hope of healing, to finally feel like I was not alone, that He was listening and hearing, that he saw every single tear. I was so filled with emotion I nearly laughed out loud through my tears!

Then came the next tender mercy.

I was feeling lost. I finally had hope to heal, finally felt like I was stepping forward, but where am I going? What was I moving towards, what do I do know, where do I go, what path do I choose? Everything I knew before this challenging phase of life, I can't ever go back to again. My ambitions and goals. My sense of self, of who I was striving to be. All of it, I can never go back to again. My life has changed and I felt so confused and bewildered and lost. No one could understand enough to offer me help or guidance. Then once again the Lord whispered to me through the scriptures:

I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you
(John 14:18)

.

And that's how this came about:

I am still learning to find my feet again. But at least now I have hope and no longer feel alone.

He hears my heartfelt prayers, sees every silent tear and offers His hand; for comfort, for guidance, for me.